Sunday, 20 June 2010
Double Post, LOL.
I think Tales of Graces Last Two Dungeons is a pretty cool guy. Eh has massive difficulty spike and doesn't afraid of anything.
Monday, 14 June 2010
Tales of Grbces.
So I finally got my hands on Tales of Graces, 6 months after the game's initial release and just a few weeks prior to E3, where we'll soon find out if the game is to receive a localisation. That said, having finally played the game, I feel well placed to finally be able to comment on it.
So, is it the best game ever? Well, no. But it is fantastic.
First things first, it's a Wii game, so obviously, it is at a disadvantage to say, Tales of Vesperia. Or at least you'd think. Truth be told, while the visuals lack that HD sheen, they are certainly more imaginative than Vesperia's. Put plainly, it is simply better designed from a visual point of view. Another point worth noting on this front is that cutscenes are motion captured, so they look more convincing than those of Vesperia.
Audio is a sticking point for any Tales game as naturally, the very mention of audio in the same breath as Tales brings up two words a lot of Japanese audiophiles dread more than anything. Motoi Sakuraba. Yes, the man is back at the helm of his 11th soundtrack for a Tales game. That said, it is a mostly innocent affair, with themes that strike as unremarkable, if not horrible, for the most part. Standout tracks include a couple of dungeon themes which have a very "Star Ocean-y" feel to them and of course the battle themes.
On that note, the battle themes this time around are handled pretty differently. Unlike Abyss or Vesperia, the FIVE main battle themes of the game, (not including the battle theme that plays during the extended prologue,) play depending on what area you are in at the time. Fighting in the snowy mountains of Fendel, for example, will cause the chilly "Cold Wind Flash" to play as the battle theme, while the deserts of Strata have their battles played out to the notably warmer and upbeat "Scorching Brawl". But while that's all well and good special mention has to be made of the style used for one of the other battle themes. I'll be frank, it sounds like an Irish Jig, which is very strange indeed...
Characters, for me, are always a high point of the series and Graces is no exception in that regard. I'll get the bad out the way first. Asbel is boring. His character is played straight from start to finish and he does nothing remarkable for the entirety of the game. On the other hand, Sophie, the game's heroine, is an adorable yet entirely awesome ass-kicker extraordinaire. Without wanting to spoil anything, Sophie gets all the good cutscenes in the game. Then there's Cheria, who is just kind of there really, I'm mostly indifferent towards her. Hubert is an interesting one for me though. His transition between child and adult is extremely dramatic in terms of the change he undergoes. Rounding out the roster are Malik, Richard and Pascal. Malik is a pretty cool old guy with a hidden past and Richard is a clichéd damsel in distress, only not a girl, (that we know of.)
Pascal on the other hand, gets her own paragraph. Yes, she's that awesome that I've dedicated as much space to her as I have all the other characters combined. I don't know quite what makes her that awesome, but I'll try and explain. First off, she is insanely fun to play as, certainly moreso than Asbel or even Sophie. This is in no small part due to the fact that her weapon is a freaking rifle staff. Then, there's her personality. The best way to describe it is as something like a mix of Rita's genius and Norma's go-getter attitude, with a dash of Harold's insanity thrown in for good measure. Basically, she's always the cheerful one in any given situation and even when she's knocked down, you can bet she'll have bounced right back within a moment. And then there's the comedy value she brings to almost everything she does. I'm talking about the dances, the scenes with the drill, anything that occurs that involves Banana pie. That and the mirror. Oh yes, the mirror...
Gameplay wise, the game is a refinement of Tales of Destiny: Directors Cut and Tales of Hearts, only in 3D rather than 2D. Given that those two are considered to be the best games in the entire series, that's a good starting point, I would say. The actual battles are amazingly good fun to play, though they are quite a departure from the way things have been done up to now. I don't know exactly how to describe it, other than to say that the system is genuinely intuitive. I found it very easy to pick up indeed, despite my minimal Japanese skills, but at the same time, like all games with the Destiny pedigree, it's very deep and hard to master.
Like I said at the beginning, the game is not perfect though. Some of the default routines for learning skills are very annoying and the AI will need tweaking to get the best out of each character. And lets not forget that the initial release of the game was glitched to hell and back. Of course, this was fixed in the revised release for the most part, but there are still occasional sound glitches and whatnot. The difficulty curve is pretty uneven too, with a sudden, huge jump in difficulty for the last third of the game.
But with that said, I wouldn't consider any of the above reason enough to not reccomend this game. It is fantastic, simple as that and even if a localisation is announced, I won't regret having splashed out on a Japanese copy. All in all, if you even moderately like even one game from the Tales series, you need this game.
p.s. The title is an intentional typo. No, he's not in this game, I was just feeling punny.
So, is it the best game ever? Well, no. But it is fantastic.
First things first, it's a Wii game, so obviously, it is at a disadvantage to say, Tales of Vesperia. Or at least you'd think. Truth be told, while the visuals lack that HD sheen, they are certainly more imaginative than Vesperia's. Put plainly, it is simply better designed from a visual point of view. Another point worth noting on this front is that cutscenes are motion captured, so they look more convincing than those of Vesperia.
Audio is a sticking point for any Tales game as naturally, the very mention of audio in the same breath as Tales brings up two words a lot of Japanese audiophiles dread more than anything. Motoi Sakuraba. Yes, the man is back at the helm of his 11th soundtrack for a Tales game. That said, it is a mostly innocent affair, with themes that strike as unremarkable, if not horrible, for the most part. Standout tracks include a couple of dungeon themes which have a very "Star Ocean-y" feel to them and of course the battle themes.
On that note, the battle themes this time around are handled pretty differently. Unlike Abyss or Vesperia, the FIVE main battle themes of the game, (not including the battle theme that plays during the extended prologue,) play depending on what area you are in at the time. Fighting in the snowy mountains of Fendel, for example, will cause the chilly "Cold Wind Flash" to play as the battle theme, while the deserts of Strata have their battles played out to the notably warmer and upbeat "Scorching Brawl". But while that's all well and good special mention has to be made of the style used for one of the other battle themes. I'll be frank, it sounds like an Irish Jig, which is very strange indeed...
Characters, for me, are always a high point of the series and Graces is no exception in that regard. I'll get the bad out the way first. Asbel is boring. His character is played straight from start to finish and he does nothing remarkable for the entirety of the game. On the other hand, Sophie, the game's heroine, is an adorable yet entirely awesome ass-kicker extraordinaire. Without wanting to spoil anything, Sophie gets all the good cutscenes in the game. Then there's Cheria, who is just kind of there really, I'm mostly indifferent towards her. Hubert is an interesting one for me though. His transition between child and adult is extremely dramatic in terms of the change he undergoes. Rounding out the roster are Malik, Richard and Pascal. Malik is a pretty cool old guy with a hidden past and Richard is a clichéd damsel in distress, only not a girl, (that we know of.)
Pascal on the other hand, gets her own paragraph. Yes, she's that awesome that I've dedicated as much space to her as I have all the other characters combined. I don't know quite what makes her that awesome, but I'll try and explain. First off, she is insanely fun to play as, certainly moreso than Asbel or even Sophie. This is in no small part due to the fact that her weapon is a freaking rifle staff. Then, there's her personality. The best way to describe it is as something like a mix of Rita's genius and Norma's go-getter attitude, with a dash of Harold's insanity thrown in for good measure. Basically, she's always the cheerful one in any given situation and even when she's knocked down, you can bet she'll have bounced right back within a moment. And then there's the comedy value she brings to almost everything she does. I'm talking about the dances, the scenes with the drill, anything that occurs that involves Banana pie. That and the mirror. Oh yes, the mirror...
Gameplay wise, the game is a refinement of Tales of Destiny: Directors Cut and Tales of Hearts, only in 3D rather than 2D. Given that those two are considered to be the best games in the entire series, that's a good starting point, I would say. The actual battles are amazingly good fun to play, though they are quite a departure from the way things have been done up to now. I don't know exactly how to describe it, other than to say that the system is genuinely intuitive. I found it very easy to pick up indeed, despite my minimal Japanese skills, but at the same time, like all games with the Destiny pedigree, it's very deep and hard to master.
Like I said at the beginning, the game is not perfect though. Some of the default routines for learning skills are very annoying and the AI will need tweaking to get the best out of each character. And lets not forget that the initial release of the game was glitched to hell and back. Of course, this was fixed in the revised release for the most part, but there are still occasional sound glitches and whatnot. The difficulty curve is pretty uneven too, with a sudden, huge jump in difficulty for the last third of the game.
But with that said, I wouldn't consider any of the above reason enough to not reccomend this game. It is fantastic, simple as that and even if a localisation is announced, I won't regret having splashed out on a Japanese copy. All in all, if you even moderately like even one game from the Tales series, you need this game.
p.s. The title is an intentional typo. No, he's not in this game, I was just feeling punny.
Glaceons are awesome.
Tuesday, 1 June 2010
Saturday, 29 May 2010
Note to Self: Version 1337.
Smugleaf is not smugleaf. Smugleaf is actually Abicion. This concept confuses and enrages me.
RE: Concrete Reasons Why I hate my DS. The DS Lite Version.
So I have a DS Lite now... I like it. Here's why;
1: Power switch is in a sensible place that you can't accidentally push when using the D-Pad
2: Sexy, shiny, ooh...!
3: Screen is bright and awesome.
4: Stylus is located in a convenient spot and isn't the size of a fingernail.
5: Start & Select are placed nicely below the main buttons.
6: Not a DS Phat
7: Screen was shiny and awesome when I bought it.
8: Headphone socket works. Nuff said.
9: Volume slider is much improved.
10: F***ing massive battery life.
11: Pokémon Heart Gold.
1: Power switch is in a sensible place that you can't accidentally push when using the D-Pad
2: Sexy, shiny, ooh...!
3: Screen is bright and awesome.
4: Stylus is located in a convenient spot and isn't the size of a fingernail.
5: Start & Select are placed nicely below the main buttons.
6: Not a DS Phat
7: Screen was shiny and awesome when I bought it.
8: Headphone socket works. Nuff said.
9: Volume slider is much improved.
10: F***ing massive battery life.
11: Pokémon Heart Gold.
On Procrastinating.
Well it's a day late and it's neither witty nor humorous, but I have a deviantArt account! Only 5 years overdue, so I didn't do too badly, I guess. http://evilsapphie.deviantart.com/
Friday, 28 May 2010
About damn time I posted something.
Too tired to create something coherent now. Note to self: Write something witty and epic for the world to see when you wake up. Also, stop eating all the cheese.
Monday, 3 May 2010
On my DS. Concrete reasons why I hate it.
1: Power switch is in an absolutely retarded place.
2: Ugly, ugly, UGLY!
3: Screen is dim and crappy.
4: Stylus is located in an awkward spot.
5: Start & Select could be placed better.
6: Not a DS Lite
7: Screen was scratched to hell when I bought it.
8: Headphone socket just does not work with wide headphone jacks. (I mean the plastic housing on the jacks specifically.)
9: Volume slider is terrible.
10: 2 F***ing hours battery life!? Are you f***ing joking!? And you can't even get replacement batteries for the original any more!!!
My wishlist: Cobalt Blue DS Lite. Somebody I know, please win the lottery, kthx.
2: Ugly, ugly, UGLY!
3: Screen is dim and crappy.
4: Stylus is located in an awkward spot.
5: Start & Select could be placed better.
6: Not a DS Lite
7: Screen was scratched to hell when I bought it.
8: Headphone socket just does not work with wide headphone jacks. (I mean the plastic housing on the jacks specifically.)
9: Volume slider is terrible.
10: 2 F***ing hours battery life!? Are you f***ing joking!? And you can't even get replacement batteries for the original any more!!!
My wishlist: Cobalt Blue DS Lite. Somebody I know, please win the lottery, kthx.
On Mudkipz and why I liek them.
So as some of you will be no doubt aware, I acquired Pokemon Heart Gold last Friday. Yes indeed, fun times have been had and as of almost exactly a week later, I had beaten the game well and truly into a bloody pulp. So I guess I'll legitimise this post by doing a review of sorts. Now, way back in the day when there were only two Pokemon games, (no really, there was such a time,) I was the owner of a copy of Pokemon Red. Together with my accidentally overpowered Arcanine, I was... Well let's just say that of all the link battles that went on in school over the lunch break, I used a Mewtwo, just like everyone else. Only my Arcanine was truly the sole Pokemon present capable of putting the hurt on the hordes of Mewtwos that wasn't a Mewtwo itself. I'm quite proud of that, considering I knew nothing about the technical aspect of the game back in those days.
But anyway, along came Yellow and I like so many others bought in to the anime tie in vibe of having Pikachu follow you, even though in my case, the most I ever watched of the anime was maybe one or two episodes and the second and third movies. Yellow was a blast, to say the least. Just different enough to make it fresh, even though it was a 90% retread of old ground. But then, Gold and Silver were announced. A brave new world with 100 more critters to catch? Day and Night cycles? A world twice the size of the original with dozens more sidequests and amusements? It seemed too good to be true and it almost was. When I think back on my days of playing Silver, all I can really remember is a great game, but certainly not a memorable one. About the only thing I can remember is a certain level 80 Pikachu...
This might explain why I never bought in on the Generation 3 games. Sure, I emulated them, but I had grown somewhat tired of the premise when they came out and besides that, I had no GBA to play them on. I only got myself a GBA after the original DS came out and to date I still only own one game for it. (No prizes for guessing what that is.) But anyway, the nail in the coffin for me was moving away from the town where we lived, which effectively isolated the entire family and killed my social life and any interest in Pokemon along with it. Certainly I know who to blame for that, but I don't hold it against them, as it's in the past now and has been for the best part of six or seven years.
Then of course, the DS came along and with it, Diamond and Pearl. I was late to the DS party, I bought my DS phat some time after the Lite was released. So I missed those two games and even only picked up Platinum recently. And then, HGSS comes along and all of a sudden, Pokemon are awesome again. So, I went down to the shops and bought a copy of Heart Gold, on the reccomendation of many different people. I was not at all disappointed with what I got.
What HGSS is, is a culmination of all the things Game Freak have learned over the last ten years. It is a triumph of learning from trial and error and the best game in the series in my opinion. It really is the original Gold and Silver, but with more heart and soul, a game which takes the best bits of each game in the series, throws it into the mix with the original Gold and Silver and comes out as much more than the sum of its parts. And besides that, it has Mudkipz.
But anyway, along came Yellow and I like so many others bought in to the anime tie in vibe of having Pikachu follow you, even though in my case, the most I ever watched of the anime was maybe one or two episodes and the second and third movies. Yellow was a blast, to say the least. Just different enough to make it fresh, even though it was a 90% retread of old ground. But then, Gold and Silver were announced. A brave new world with 100 more critters to catch? Day and Night cycles? A world twice the size of the original with dozens more sidequests and amusements? It seemed too good to be true and it almost was. When I think back on my days of playing Silver, all I can really remember is a great game, but certainly not a memorable one. About the only thing I can remember is a certain level 80 Pikachu...
This might explain why I never bought in on the Generation 3 games. Sure, I emulated them, but I had grown somewhat tired of the premise when they came out and besides that, I had no GBA to play them on. I only got myself a GBA after the original DS came out and to date I still only own one game for it. (No prizes for guessing what that is.) But anyway, the nail in the coffin for me was moving away from the town where we lived, which effectively isolated the entire family and killed my social life and any interest in Pokemon along with it. Certainly I know who to blame for that, but I don't hold it against them, as it's in the past now and has been for the best part of six or seven years.
Then of course, the DS came along and with it, Diamond and Pearl. I was late to the DS party, I bought my DS phat some time after the Lite was released. So I missed those two games and even only picked up Platinum recently. And then, HGSS comes along and all of a sudden, Pokemon are awesome again. So, I went down to the shops and bought a copy of Heart Gold, on the reccomendation of many different people. I was not at all disappointed with what I got.
What HGSS is, is a culmination of all the things Game Freak have learned over the last ten years. It is a triumph of learning from trial and error and the best game in the series in my opinion. It really is the original Gold and Silver, but with more heart and soul, a game which takes the best bits of each game in the series, throws it into the mix with the original Gold and Silver and comes out as much more than the sum of its parts. And besides that, it has Mudkipz.
Labels:
Awesomesauce,
JRPG,
Just As Planned,
Mudkipz,
Nostalgia?
Monday, 5 April 2010
On being a year older and STILL awesome.
So, your friendly neighbourhood Sapphie has turned 25. A year older, a year wiser, maybe? Hah, as if! So you'll be pleased to know that despite falling into the 25-30 age range, I'm still going to act like a complete idiot. Because I can. And yes, I will continue to be awesome in an egotistical, but entirely aware-of-my-hypocrisy sort of manner. And with that said, let's move on to the serious business, shall we?
So, I'm pretty obsessed with Leaf Forest Zone, Act 1. Yeah. Serious business indeed. But the fact is, I might not be the best, but I'm damned good. Okay, maybe not as Sonic, but screw Sonic. He's fast and cool and stuff, but he's not an adorable bunny wabbit who has a living homing missile in tow. Yeah. So anyway, times, yeah...
Anyhow, that's all I've got to say for now. Gonna upload my 1st Youtube video soon - I'm thinkin a video of one of my runs just so I can watch it myself and revel in the glory of my own over inflated ego... :)
So, I'm pretty obsessed with Leaf Forest Zone, Act 1. Yeah. Serious business indeed. But the fact is, I might not be the best, but I'm damned good. Okay, maybe not as Sonic, but screw Sonic. He's fast and cool and stuff, but he's not an adorable bunny wabbit who has a living homing missile in tow. Yeah. So anyway, times, yeah...
Anyhow, that's all I've got to say for now. Gonna upload my 1st Youtube video soon - I'm thinkin a video of one of my runs just so I can watch it myself and revel in the glory of my own over inflated ego... :)
Thursday, 1 April 2010
Tuesday, 30 March 2010
On Leaked Soundtracks and Writing
So, the Sonic 4 Episode 1 Soundtrack has somehow leaked it's way onto the net. I've had a listen and well, what can I say? While there are a couple of outstanding tracks overall, the quality of the tracks as a whole is painfully average. And that's before we even get started on the terrible synth work - soundfonts that make Motoi Sakuraba's worst days look like flashes of genius.
Something about his face just isn't right in this render...

Though, like I said, there are high points. Namely, Lost Labyrinth Zone Act 2, the Invincibility Theme and Mad Gear Zone Act 3, which somehow sounds like it would fit perfectly for both Metropolis Zone and Flying Battery Zone. Can't wait to hear the remixes of that one, that's for sure.
It could be worse...

On a more positive note, I've finally managed to overcome my writers block. So that's good at least. And now that's done, I'm gonna continue with my plan to destroy the world. :3
p.s. I was going over the list of characters that definitely won't appear in Sonic the Hedgehog 4 and noticed something. No mention of Tails, Knuckles, or Cream. Given that she's appeared in 3 of the 5 Dimps Sonic games thus far, I can't help but wonder, (and hope lol.)
On Photoshop and my PSP
Time for some more showing off on my part, I think. Here's 6 wallpaper's I've created for the PSP then... Click for full size.
Ah yes, Tales of the- REPLICAAAAAAAA!
Hugo is a Badtoucher. Just ask Emilia.
THE HAIR IS ONLY PURPLE BECAUSE OF THE GRADIENT THAT'S OVER IT!!!
O hai thar, ToD splash screen ^^
Pascal lookin kinda "Graceful" there. *shot*
Combo breaker of awesome and win. :3






And there we have it. Can you guess which one I'm using right now?
Monday, 29 March 2010
On Writers Block and Decisions.
A man once said to me, "U mad?"
Naturally, my answer was yes. That is why I'm split between playing 2 different games right now. On the one hand, I have Namco Tales Studio's Tales of Rebirth, for PS2, which I'm around halfway through. On the other, I have Level 5's Jeanne D'Arc, for PSP, which I've gotten a little into, but far enough to know the titular heroine's special attack is uber broken. So, I have a decision to make. Common sense dictates that I should play Tales of Rebirth first and finish Jeanne D'Arc while I'm away on holiday. But as anyone who knows me in person will attest, I've never been one for being sensible in that regard. So, (And given the people that I know are going to read this, I know the results will be somewhat skewed,) I'll ask the audience, so to speak. Which one first?
And writers block. Oh boy... You know, having to write a character that isn't yours is really, really hard.
So, how does one go about writing an introduction for a shy, emotionally repressed hero who can't really fight? You know, that's probably the single most clichéd character archetype in existence, but I'm still having trouble with it... The role reversal doesn't really help either, as it's the heroine of the story who's the strong one and the main protagonist, so...
Naturally, my answer was yes. That is why I'm split between playing 2 different games right now. On the one hand, I have Namco Tales Studio's Tales of Rebirth, for PS2, which I'm around halfway through. On the other, I have Level 5's Jeanne D'Arc, for PSP, which I've gotten a little into, but far enough to know the titular heroine's special attack is uber broken. So, I have a decision to make. Common sense dictates that I should play Tales of Rebirth first and finish Jeanne D'Arc while I'm away on holiday. But as anyone who knows me in person will attest, I've never been one for being sensible in that regard. So, (And given the people that I know are going to read this, I know the results will be somewhat skewed,) I'll ask the audience, so to speak. Which one first?
And writers block. Oh boy... You know, having to write a character that isn't yours is really, really hard.
So, how does one go about writing an introduction for a shy, emotionally repressed hero who can't really fight? You know, that's probably the single most clichéd character archetype in existence, but I'm still having trouble with it... The role reversal doesn't really help either, as it's the heroine of the story who's the strong one and the main protagonist, so...
Sunday, 28 March 2010
My hands are stinging!
So, as a finisher to the week's theme, I decided to upload all my best times, as of last night.
I know I could go faster if I could air dash consistently...
Attack of the duplicate times again. Though all are sub 40!
And naturally, the champion is saved for last. Or is she...?
Those were the best times as of last night. Last night was 18 hours ago. I have played the game since then. And I have beat Amy's time. How? Well with Cream of course. Now, though I don't have a video of my own, I can show how I did it. My run was based on the following video, with exactly the same route used;
And now, my own screencap with the new time;
Behold, the closest I'm ever going to get to any kind of World Record.
(0:35:8X is the fastest time for Cream.)



Those were the best times as of last night. Last night was 18 hours ago. I have played the game since then. And I have beat Amy's time. How? Well with Cream of course. Now, though I don't have a video of my own, I can show how I did it. My run was based on the following video, with exactly the same route used;
And now, my own screencap with the new time;

(0:35:8X is the fastest time for Cream.)
On conquering and continuation of a theme.
Welcome back to Evil Sapphie's Pit of Lulz. Last time, I discussed my general dislike for my fellow Sonic fans and in keeping with the theme of the week, I am going to talk about the Sonic games some more. Bet you didn't see that one coming. So anyway, the whole purpose of this post is simply to announce that I have finally cracked the sub 40 second barrier on Sonic Advance 2's first level, Leaf Forest Zone, Act One. Even greater is the rage any "True Sonic Fan" is going to feel when they read the following statement. I did it with Amy Rose. Yes, the slow pink fuzzball who according to most of the fanbase, needs to go die in a fire.
Times 2 and 3 are identical, as you'll notice.

Ironically, she is strictly speaking the second fastest character in the game, behind Sonic of course, as she shares his speed and moveset, but lacks his ability to accelerate quickly with an air dash, (which is an annoying move to pull off without a decent controller, believe me, since I'm emulating the game on my PSP and controlling it with the infamous PSP 1000 D-Pad. I do own Sonic Advance 2 physically, though, just for the record.)
Also, I have no idea how I managed to get exactly 0:40:28 twice. Granted, I took the same route both times, but to match times on a perfect run is still surprising. The extra 1.4 seconds came from a perfectly timed jump around 3/4 of the way through the course that enabled me to skip one of the rotating swing arms - those things have a huge impact on your overall time if you land on one.
Anyway, to close the post I would like to offer the following up to anyone that reads this post: Anyone think they can do better?
p.s. I've been on board with Sonic since the days of the Master System and I like Amy, Cream and Big. And I don't like Shadow. Far too "Serious Business" for my liking.
p.p.s. Screw you if you disagree.
p.p.p.s. I promise not to talk about Sonic in my next post. Possibly.
Also, I have no idea how I managed to get exactly 0:40:28 twice. Granted, I took the same route both times, but to match times on a perfect run is still surprising. The extra 1.4 seconds came from a perfectly timed jump around 3/4 of the way through the course that enabled me to skip one of the rotating swing arms - those things have a huge impact on your overall time if you land on one.
Anyway, to close the post I would like to offer the following up to anyone that reads this post: Anyone think they can do better?
p.s. I've been on board with Sonic since the days of the Master System and I like Amy, Cream and Big. And I don't like Shadow. Far too "Serious Business" for my liking.
p.p.s. Screw you if you disagree.
p.p.p.s. I promise not to talk about Sonic in my next post. Possibly.
Saturday, 27 March 2010
On Hypocrisy and Slime.
As a semi continuation of my previous post, I present you with the following statement; The Sonic fan base is a bunch of self serving hypocrites that need to be dropped into a river of bio slime.
Perhaps I should actually make some effort to explain. Now, the Sonic Fanbase are a very hard to please lot, it's widely known. The only thing they tend to agree on is that Sonic '06 sucked hard. So why are they hypocrites? Simple. A vast majority of them are known to be very critical of the use of bottomless pits in more recent Sonic Games. For example, I would say things started to get out of hand after Sonic Adventure 2, while others would say anything past Sonic & Knuckles should never have been made. Nonetheless, they are a problem in the more recent games as they are used as a very cheap way of adding challenge to the game. Now, why does this make Sonic Fans hypocrites? Well, you're familiar with the phrase "think you can do better," correct? Well, let's put that into application, shall we? I'm talking hacks. The sublime Megamix hacks aside, most all of the level edits available for Sonic 1 & 2 are designed with frustrating amounts of bottomless pits. Granted, they are meant to be harder than the original game, but blind jumping onto a moving platform that's as wide as Sonic is? Give me a break...
Although, there are games besides Megamix which do it right. S Factor being a good example - That game is damned hard, but not because there's a massive bottomless pit in Act 2 of the first zone. It's the boss I can't kill and for me, that's the way it should be. Also, speed shoes music is made of awesome and win. End of story.
And that, ladies and gents, is why Sonic Fans need to be dropped in a river of hate - inducing slime. It'll do them some good.
Perhaps I should actually make some effort to explain. Now, the Sonic Fanbase are a very hard to please lot, it's widely known. The only thing they tend to agree on is that Sonic '06 sucked hard. So why are they hypocrites? Simple. A vast majority of them are known to be very critical of the use of bottomless pits in more recent Sonic Games. For example, I would say things started to get out of hand after Sonic Adventure 2, while others would say anything past Sonic & Knuckles should never have been made. Nonetheless, they are a problem in the more recent games as they are used as a very cheap way of adding challenge to the game. Now, why does this make Sonic Fans hypocrites? Well, you're familiar with the phrase "think you can do better," correct? Well, let's put that into application, shall we? I'm talking hacks. The sublime Megamix hacks aside, most all of the level edits available for Sonic 1 & 2 are designed with frustrating amounts of bottomless pits. Granted, they are meant to be harder than the original game, but blind jumping onto a moving platform that's as wide as Sonic is? Give me a break...
Although, there are games besides Megamix which do it right. S Factor being a good example - That game is damned hard, but not because there's a massive bottomless pit in Act 2 of the first zone. It's the boss I can't kill and for me, that's the way it should be. Also, speed shoes music is made of awesome and win. End of story.
And that, ladies and gents, is why Sonic Fans need to be dropped in a river of hate - inducing slime. It'll do them some good.
Thursday, 25 March 2010
On not updating regularly;
Well, it's been half a month since I last updated, due mostly to procrastination on my part and the fact that I can't really think of much to write about. So I'll talk about a game I started playing recently. It's called "Sonic the Hedgehog Megamix". As stated by the information page on Sonic Retro,
"Sonic the Hedgehog Megamix (commonly shortened to Sonic Megamix) is a multiperson assembly modification of the original Sonic the Hedgehog video game for the Sega Mega Drive, headed up by Team Megamix and released for the Sega Mega CD. The game features the ability to play as one of five different characters: Sonic The Hedgehog, Mighty the Armadillo, Shadow the Hedgehog, Miles "Tails Prower, or Knuckles the Echidna. It features an extensive reworking of the original game with new art, music, abilities and layouts, among other things."
To the uninitiated, this means it is a fan hack of the original Sonic The Hedgehog, incorporating gameplay elements from the other Mega Drive Sonic Games, such as the elemental shields from Sonic 3 & Knuckles. It is unquestionably the best game hack I've ever played, due in no small part to the dedication of the team behind it. The levels, for example are well designed and absolutely huge - even the first stage will take well over 2 minutes to complete on a speed run. There's also a definite emphasis on non lethal traps, as opposed to the infamous bottomless pits of the recent Sonic games.
The most notable thing about this game, however, is the Misty Maze zone, this game's interpretation of the Labyrinth Zone. The art for it is absolutely gorgeous, especially the custom background, which is a work of (pixel) art! The design of the level is absolutely devious in places as well. The biggest downside to the game, (other than including Shadow, *hiss*, who is a total Sonic Clone, instead of say, Blaze,) is that it is for the Sega CD/Mega CD addon. But these days, that is like to a minor inconvenience at worst.
Do yourself a favour and pick it up from here.
"Sonic the Hedgehog Megamix (commonly shortened to Sonic Megamix) is a multiperson assembly modification of the original Sonic the Hedgehog video game for the Sega Mega Drive, headed up by Team Megamix and released for the Sega Mega CD. The game features the ability to play as one of five different characters: Sonic The Hedgehog, Mighty the Armadillo, Shadow the Hedgehog, Miles "Tails Prower, or Knuckles the Echidna. It features an extensive reworking of the original game with new art, music, abilities and layouts, among other things."
To the uninitiated, this means it is a fan hack of the original Sonic The Hedgehog, incorporating gameplay elements from the other Mega Drive Sonic Games, such as the elemental shields from Sonic 3 & Knuckles. It is unquestionably the best game hack I've ever played, due in no small part to the dedication of the team behind it. The levels, for example are well designed and absolutely huge - even the first stage will take well over 2 minutes to complete on a speed run. There's also a definite emphasis on non lethal traps, as opposed to the infamous bottomless pits of the recent Sonic games.
The most notable thing about this game, however, is the Misty Maze zone, this game's interpretation of the Labyrinth Zone. The art for it is absolutely gorgeous, especially the custom background, which is a work of (pixel) art! The design of the level is absolutely devious in places as well. The biggest downside to the game, (other than including Shadow, *hiss*, who is a total Sonic Clone, instead of say, Blaze,) is that it is for the Sega CD/Mega CD addon. But these days, that is like to a minor inconvenience at worst.
Do yourself a favour and pick it up from here.
Saturday, 6 March 2010
Tuesday, 23 February 2010
Stare into the abyss long enough...
I hate my DS. I love my PSP. How, or indeed why things are this way, I do not know. I really should like my DS. It has awesome games and many more than my PSP and yet, I find myself overcome with hate when I stare at it's bulky grey visage. Yes, I have one of the original DS consoles, the type which looks like some children's toy


"The Fellbeast" in all it's grey fugly glory.
Hideous, isn't it? Not a day goes by when I don't think about how stupid it looks. And on top of that, the hinges are near-broken, the screen is dim, the touch screen is off center and I can't seem to name more than a handful of games for the system that I genuinely enjoy. While this is not enough for me to hate the system, I still do.
The there's my PSP. And my PSP. And my PSP. Oh, and my dismantled PSP. But today, I'm just going to talk about my PSP. Though, thanks in no small part to a Frankenstein's monster of a case conversion on my part, it isn't ecactly the prettiest PSP in the world, it is most certainly one of a kind, as these pictured demonstrate...
...OMG, LIEK, WTH IS TAHT?
I should point out right now that the reason it has a blue battery cover is because the white one broke. Mainly from me dropping my PSP constantly. Considering the punishment it's had, it's one hell of a tough machine. It has to be though, as it serves as my mp3 player, movie theatre and primary games console all rolled into one. And when I say primary games console, I mean it's more than just a Playstation Portable, as it houses not only PSP and PS1 games of mine, but also pretty much every major Nintendo and Sega console from the 16 bit era and before, as well as functioning as a perfect GBA to boot. As for PSP games, there are a lot of good ones. You just need to dig a little.
I dunno. I probably need my head checking, but for me, my PSP is by far the better of the two.
Additional Offenders in this post: My Logitech G11 Keyboard, a copy of Nero 7 Essentials (Hiss...), a Maped Softy Eraser, a Staedtler Noris(!) HB pencil, a 0.2 drawing pen and a copy of Bioshock for the PC, which I haven't played yet.
Sir Not Appearing in This Post: My original GBA, which I prefer infinitely to my DS. It is a limited edition silver one though and despite a few scratches, I think it looks amazing. Retconned from my post idea due to the camera running out of battery power again... My fault for buying terribad rechargeables.
The there's my PSP. And my PSP. And my PSP. Oh, and my dismantled PSP. But today, I'm just going to talk about my PSP. Though, thanks in no small part to a Frankenstein's monster of a case conversion on my part, it isn't ecactly the prettiest PSP in the world, it is most certainly one of a kind, as these pictured demonstrate...
I should point out right now that the reason it has a blue battery cover is because the white one broke. Mainly from me dropping my PSP constantly. Considering the punishment it's had, it's one hell of a tough machine. It has to be though, as it serves as my mp3 player, movie theatre and primary games console all rolled into one. And when I say primary games console, I mean it's more than just a Playstation Portable, as it houses not only PSP and PS1 games of mine, but also pretty much every major Nintendo and Sega console from the 16 bit era and before, as well as functioning as a perfect GBA to boot. As for PSP games, there are a lot of good ones. You just need to dig a little.
I dunno. I probably need my head checking, but for me, my PSP is by far the better of the two.
Additional Offenders in this post: My Logitech G11 Keyboard, a copy of Nero 7 Essentials (Hiss...), a Maped Softy Eraser, a Staedtler Noris(!) HB pencil, a 0.2 drawing pen and a copy of Bioshock for the PC, which I haven't played yet.
Sir Not Appearing in This Post: My original GBA, which I prefer infinitely to my DS. It is a limited edition silver one though and despite a few scratches, I think it looks amazing. Retconned from my post idea due to the camera running out of battery power again... My fault for buying terribad rechargeables.
Saturday, 20 February 2010
Another post so soon? How disorganised is this guy!?
I feel that while I am in an inherently silly mood, I should also point out something else I find funny. Yes, I'm talking about he who must not be named. And not the Harry Potter one, either. He doesn't kidnap you mid sentence if you mention his name. Voldemort. There, I said it and I'm still here, which proves my point. No I am of course talking about the one from Freakazoid, who I will not be stupid enough to openly mention, since I quite enjoy my freedom, thank you very much.
Though he only appeared in 2 episodes of the show, his appearances have garnered him somewhat of a cult following, owing much to his being a great example of Nightmare Fuel, not to mention the amusing effect of mentioning his name in written speech and then being cut off mid sentence, as he kidnaps you before you can finish, but has the decency to hit submit for your post. Obviously, this is a case of "Just As Planned~~~" on his part, though he never has been heard to utter such a line, unlike certain people this blogger could mention, who include, but are not limited to a sadist and a certain king of a certain country.
So in conclusion, I shall offer the following piece of indispensable advice for those who are not already in the know;
Never, EVER, under any circumstances, say the name Candle Jack, as doing so will get you kidnapped pretty much immediately, without any time to explain wh
Though he only appeared in 2 episodes of the show, his appearances have garnered him somewhat of a cult following, owing much to his being a great example of Nightmare Fuel, not to mention the amusing effect of mentioning his name in written speech and then being cut off mid sentence, as he kidnaps you before you can finish, but has the decency to hit submit for your post. Obviously, this is a case of "Just As Planned~~~" on his part, though he never has been heard to utter such a line, unlike certain people this blogger could mention, who include, but are not limited to a sadist and a certain king of a certain country.
So in conclusion, I shall offer the following piece of indispensable advice for those who are not already in the know;
Never, EVER, under any circumstances, say the name Candle Jack, as doing so will get you kidnapped pretty much immediately, without any time to explain wh
On the ancient and venerable art of Bone Crunching.
Well now, what's this? A whole week without a post from me? Okay then, this should fix that. Anyway, today, I would like to talk about bone-crushing headlocks, which are in this blogger's view a very good thing, though certainly less so for the unfortunate recipient as demonstrated in figure A:
This image amuses me no end. Here, we see the "Bone Cruncher" at it's finest, as the Bone Cruncher, one Nanaly Fletch, of Tales of Destiny 2, inflicts a devastating headlock upon Loni Dunamis, her erstwhile co star and frequent recipient of Bone Crunchings.
Now you may be asking why the hell I've bothered to post something like this. Well the truth is, that if this post has any point at all it is that I like my games with a slightly twisted sense of humour. You don't find this in games like Final Fantasy any more, with most all of their soul being lost in the transition to HD. That's one reason among many I won't be buying Final Fantasy 13, at least not new.

Now you may be asking why the hell I've bothered to post something like this. Well the truth is, that if this post has any point at all it is that I like my games with a slightly twisted sense of humour. You don't find this in games like Final Fantasy any more, with most all of their soul being lost in the transition to HD. That's one reason among many I won't be buying Final Fantasy 13, at least not new.
Friday, 12 February 2010
The Only TV I'll Watch (tm)
Tonight, we make some random observations about television! The latest offering from something goes up against something else! And I get blown up. Again!
Such is the favoured introduction for a little known TV show called Top Gear, the subject of my really quite specific entry title for today. To sum Top Gear up is difficult in that yes, it is a car show, but at the same time, it is also something far greater, far more significant. The basic premise of the show is three men presenting a show about cars. Boring? If it were anything else, then yes, but Top Gear uses this premise as an excuse for doing some very, very silly things. For example, the first American roadtrip, several years ago now, where they painted slogans on each others cars while driving through the deep south. These slogans included such gems as "Nascar Sucks," "Gay Pride," and "Hillary for President." Naturally, these didn't go down so well with the locals, but given that the trio were trying to see who would get shot first, that was kind of the point.
Such is the favoured introduction for a little known TV show called Top Gear, the subject of my really quite specific entry title for today. To sum Top Gear up is difficult in that yes, it is a car show, but at the same time, it is also something far greater, far more significant. The basic premise of the show is three men presenting a show about cars. Boring? If it were anything else, then yes, but Top Gear uses this premise as an excuse for doing some very, very silly things. For example, the first American roadtrip, several years ago now, where they painted slogans on each others cars while driving through the deep south. These slogans included such gems as "Nascar Sucks," "Gay Pride," and "Hillary for President." Naturally, these didn't go down so well with the locals, but given that the trio were trying to see who would get shot first, that was kind of the point.
Thursday, 11 February 2010
Vidja Games
So. I like role playing games. Anyone who knows me will attest to this, with my obsession being so great, that I even listen to the music from them regularly. Right now, it's the SSH mix of Final Fantasy VI's boss battle, for those that care. Anyway, some of my favourite games from the genre are Suikoden V, Wild ARMs 3 and most of the "Tales of" series. The reason? Charectorisation, primarily. The reason I prefer these games to their Western rivals, such as Baldur's Gate, Neverwinter Knights amd The Elder Scrolls, is simply because they tell their stories better and their characters are often less two dimensional. W-RPGs claim to be better because they give the player the freedom to choose their path. In reality, that is a poor excuse for shoddy narrative and in most cases, a mere illusion. For example, all the freedom to explore in Oblivion can never mask the fact that the actual story itself was short and incredibly clichéd. Not to mention the dialogue. Oh god, the dialogue, how did they think using 4 voice actors for a hundred people would ever be immersive? Bottom line though: It's just a "chosen one" story like 99% of all role playing games, regardless of origin.
Labels:
Cliché,
Gaming,
JRPG,
Video Games,
Voice Acting,
WRPG
Tuesday, 9 February 2010
The BBC
So, the BBC has revealed the total amount it pays to it's stars. That is, it paid out £229 million for the year up to March '09. Now, this may seem like a hell of a lot, but one must not forget that the BBC has employment contracts with over 300,000 people. If all these people were in full time employment with the BBC, the average pay would be less that £750 a year.
Of course, politicians are like to ignore this fact, because the BBC refuses to reveal individual pay levels in order to give it's performers some measure of privacy. That, in my opinion, is fair enough, as the BBC provides an indispensable service to the country and indeed, around the world. Individual earnings being published would just lead to a push by the government to censure the BBC for overpaying it's stars. In my opinion, that could be considered an attack on free speech.
Of course, this is all thanks to our politicians being forced to reveal their expenses. Okay, we pay for both our politicians and the BBC in the UK, but the crucial difference is that the BBC is not morally bankrupt. Our leadership would sell us all out for a couple of quid and a bag of crisps if it thought it could get away with it. Oh wait, they already did. A shame then that the only way to fix this is to vote Liberal Democrat, since they don't have a hope in hell of winning against Labour and the Tories.
Of course, politicians are like to ignore this fact, because the BBC refuses to reveal individual pay levels in order to give it's performers some measure of privacy. That, in my opinion, is fair enough, as the BBC provides an indispensable service to the country and indeed, around the world. Individual earnings being published would just lead to a push by the government to censure the BBC for overpaying it's stars. In my opinion, that could be considered an attack on free speech.
Of course, this is all thanks to our politicians being forced to reveal their expenses. Okay, we pay for both our politicians and the BBC in the UK, but the crucial difference is that the BBC is not morally bankrupt. Our leadership would sell us all out for a couple of quid and a bag of crisps if it thought it could get away with it. Oh wait, they already did. A shame then that the only way to fix this is to vote Liberal Democrat, since they don't have a hope in hell of winning against Labour and the Tories.
Monday, 8 February 2010
Burn The Witch!
So, here it is, the long awaited blog by yet another total unknown. I'm Evil Sapphie, pleased to meet ya. In this blog, I shall be discussing some of the most pressing issues of our time. Is the United Kingdom turning into a Communist state? Are our moral standards lower than ever? What should I have for dinner? And of course, why are W-RPGs all so bad?
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